Ask Kayla Quinn

[June 12, 2010] -

Lexx, I am glad you enjoyed the FleshLight! They're awesome male sex toys, one of the very best on the market. Does lasting a long time with the FleshLight mean you'll last a long time with your gf? Not necessarily! You controlled the movement of the toy, but your partner will be moving on her own! While it isn't a guarantee, it is encouraging! Good luck!

[March 1, 2010] -

Todd, you are a victim of the media, hunny bunny! Your penis is actually nearly twice the size of the average man. Not the average 16 yr old, but the average full-grown man. The penis sizes are broken down here: answering David V's question. So, as far as the SIZE goes, your girlfriend won't think it's small but she might be a little intimidated by the size of your fuckstick! Good luck getting her to be able to keep a brave face when she sees that trouser snake! I know experienced porn stars who are a touch fearful when booked for scenes with cocks the size of yours!

Onto the masturbation question...skim thru this for a little info...then read this one...between the two columns, you should be able to get an idea of how to speed things up, so to speak!

Todd, please do not take this the wrong way, but if you're unsure if you're ready for sex...then you're probably not. It doesn't mean you're less of a man or that you're "weird"...it means it isn't the right time in your life yet. If you decide, however, to plunge in to the fucking game, do me a favor? Realize that you have a WEAPON between your legs and learn how to use your cock as a tool for pleasure and not just ram your partners tender spots like you had a baseball bat between your legs! There have been COUNTLESS times I've been with a guy with a larger-than-average cock and he thought size was the same as skill. It isn't, just because it's big doesn't mean it's always good. A man with a huge cock and no skill = a bruised cervix!

In summation: it is not always a matter of stuffing as much meat in a pussy as you can cram in there...the vagina DOES have a limit to what it can do!

[February 10, 2010] -

Some lotions, Joe, can get gummy feeling when used as a masturbatory agent. Others can allow friction to build up...and not in a pleasant way. Instead of using a regular hand lotion or moisturizer, I recommend either buying lubricants specifically made for genital contact OR cocoa butter. Commercial lubes come in many viscosities and formulations. Silicon-based lubes are some of the most popular types, as they do not weaken condoms. (Like water-based lubes, they're safe to use with condoms and other latex products, but they last longer.) Another advantage? The silicone-based lubes can actually be used IN water (think: kinky hot tub action). One major disadvantage to these marvels of modern science: you have to use soap and water to get the lube off your hands, your cock, your partner, etc. Water-based lubes are just as condom-safe, but they can get sticky, don't last anywhere near as long and are easily washed away (say good bye to the hot tub sex). H2O lubes can, however, be wiped off after sexing the good old bachelor way! You know, grab the t-shirt you had just been wearing and wipe your Johnson, roll over and go to bed! I am going to VERY briefly touch on oil-based lubes, just to round out the three major categories. Oil-based lubes (Vaseline, no-name petroleum jelly or lotion) are not recommended for sex because they tend to break down latex. They can lead to infections by leaving a coating on the vagina, rectum and penis. Males masturbating can use oil-based lubes as a way to avoid chafing or to try something new. Here's the thing though, should you buy any of these oil-based slickers, make SURE you do not accidentally grab it in place of a water or silicone based mood when sexing someone else! A failed condom is as valuable as an absent one...it'll offer no protection. I suggest you try either the silicone-based lube (KY Intrigue, ForPlay, Wet, ID and Kama Sutra are all examples of silicone-based lube brands), which can be found in this dvd/novelty online shop or cocoa butter. Then reason I like cocoa butter (BESIDES the fact that the best brand is actually called Palmer's and a masturbation aid distributed by a company named Palmer's cracks me up for some unknown reason) is simple: it's viscous, it's natural and it can be used in a vagina without hurting it! It's what I call a "lick and stick"...you can lick it without getting sick and you can stick it on your girl without her pussy getting sick!

[December 28, 2009] -

Anil, thank you! Let me see, where to begin? A 6 hour handjob, huh? I *LOVE* cock, but even I do not want to think about having to tug on one for that long! My arm would hurt and the resentment would build...6 hours is a lot of "you time"! The amount of friction that your cock would be exposed to, no matter HOW much lube you use, would most likely leave it tender and sore.

Swallowing...barring any venereal disease, your partner should have no health risks from swallowing your load. DO keep in mind that whatever you eat, you secrete! Be good to your lover and eat healthily. I recommend drinking pineapple juice regularly in order to sweeten your man milk.

As for what I like to do more, fucking is my number one but out of the options listed, I would have to say blow job!

[December 15, 2009] -

Hello Joe, instead of giving you a smart-ass quip, let me instead give you a few tips! First of all, the more frequently you ejaculate the longer it will take you to do so. The reason? Sensitivity. The second time you cum always takes a bit longer. (That's why you stroke one out before a date.) Your body just takes a bit to recoup, plain and simple. Also, get rid of any distractions! Turn off your cell phone, put the dog/cat out of the room, clear your mind of any unrelated matters. Not to sound like your high school coach, but: FOCUS!

Hope these suggestions help! There's nothing more frustrating than chasing an elusive orgasm, trust me...I know!

[November 30, 2009] -

Sounds to me like she's got issues! Until she comes to terms with her sexuality and sex, it just ain't going to happen! Honey, is she cannot get herself off, you're not going to be able to either!

If she's enjoying the intimacy, I wouldn't sweat it TOO hard...I would, however, suggest she figures out why she's holding herself back. Damn our society for pressuring girls to NOT experiment sexually!

[September 17, 2009] -

Nope, just curious!

[February 11, 2009] -

Hello James...first of all, there is nothing wrong with masturbation as long as it does not interfere with "real life" issues. If you are missing classes, work, assignment deadlines, etc because you're stroking the monkey, you've got a problem, otherwise you're fine. As for virginity...ALL of us were virgins at one point; it is nothing to be ashamed of my dear! Sounds to me as though you are not looking for a "relationship" at all, but a conquest! If you are just looking to hook up and fuck, there is nothing wrong with that type of a situation as long as all parties involved understand the situation going in...it is when people are mislead that the drama ensues. As for what *I* would do in your place...the odds of meeting a flesh and blood woman increase exponentially if you venture away from the computer and put yourself in social situations. That said, I would actually turn my computer off and look for actual physical contact...

[December 4, 2008] -

Try jacking yourself off in a way that feels like a pussy wrapping itself around your cock. To do this,lie on your side and grasp your cock in your hand. Go with a full fisted grip, but make sure you grab your penis from the left and not from the right, as per the usual grip or a right-handed man. Then you twist your wrist in such a way that the thumb is pointing down instead of up. You might have to pull the penis to the side in order to achieve the correct grip, but don’t worry about it because the position is perfectly natural. Flip over onto your stomach on your bed. Pump away!

Want to feel like the vagina never ends? Stroke the usual way, you know...a fistful of cock...as soon as the head of your dick pokes through one fist, put your other hand to good use! Creating a long tunnel of substitute pussy, stroke like there's no tomorrow! Try twisting your hand in a spiral motion while thrusting...

Want something a little different? Palm your cock. Slap some of your favorite lube onto your palm and rub the head of your cock back and forth over the slippery surface. You'll enjoy different sensations than the usual stroking.

Applying ice or pressure to your balls just as you orgasm is said to be extremely pleasurable, as well.

[August 6, 2008] -

I am not really a big fan of labels when it comes to sexuality. Do I think you are bi-sexual if you play with a dildo? No. Do I think you are "straight" because you only fuck women? Not at all. Sexuality goes beyond the physical, my dear! You most likely just discovered the pleasure receptors around your anus have been neglected and you're probably wondering why it took you so long to acknowledge them! ;)

[June 26, 2008] -

Hi Buck...if you liked sex before you went away, you will like it when you get back! Masturbating is perfectly healthy. Not only is a terrific stress releaser, it also helps one get to know their body and what actually feels best to them. By knowing what turns you on, you can better communicate with your partner. With better communication, comes better sex!

As far as damaging your penis goes...utilizing lube while stroking your cock will stave off chafing; remembering that you are tugging your penis, not arm-wrestling a foe will keep you from pulling a groin muscle; staying hydrated will keep you from getting cramps.

[December 12, 2007] -

Easy! My Sybian!!

[December 6, 2007] -

Hi Marcie! There are some toys that are "better" to share than others. The less porous the material, the better. Hard plastic, glass and acrylic toys are more desirable candidates than those made of rubber-like compounds. Of course, you can always use condoms on toys just as you can on a cock!

Before using anything borrowed, be sure to clean it thoroughly! There are several adult toy cleaners on the market. Anti-bacterial soaps can be used as well, but I prefer to use cleaner specifically made for toys. Be sure to rinse the freshly cleaned dildo completely before use!

Always return intimate objects clean and empty of batteries. (More information on the proper care and storage of sex toys can be found HERE.) A note of thanks and/or a small token gift add a nice touch!

Have fun!

[October 3, 2007] - You won't damage your balls, but unless you find another way to alleviate stress, you might damage some friendships!

[September 11, 2007] - While there are days that I cannot seem to get off often enough, there are others where I don't masturbate at all. I have actually had days where all I do is lay in front of the television, remote control in one had and sex toy in the other! I generally use a vibrating egg style toy when I play with myself. On my mind, typically, while I build up to my climax? My RL bf... amazingly mundane for a pornstar, I am afraid! At least, that is the case now. It has not always been that way, though. As for fantasies... I have made it my mission to oneby-one live them out as they came to me. Luckily, my career path has been very condusive to that! My most recent accomplishment was finding a restaurant which allowed nudity. Once the curtains were closed around our booth, the four of us dining together that evening shed clothing and inhibitions and fucked between the courses of our meal! That one has been one of the more difficult fantasies to fulfill but was WELL worth the wait!

[July 28, 2007] - What a thoughtful boyfriend you are! Choosing a vibrator is as personal as choosing a car. You need to know what is important to the driver, so to speak. I think the best way to make sure both of you are happy and satisfied with your purchase is for you to shop together! A few things to consider: Does she enjoy clitoral stimulation? Deep vaginal penetration? Both? There are many wonderful B.O.B.'s (Battery Operated Boyfriend's) on the market today. If this is her first toy, I recommend a standard pocket rocket. A pocket rocket is basically a phallus shaped toy, which by means of batteries, vibrates. It generally has a dial-operated control on the end of the toy, allowing the user to control the speed of the vibration. Unless you know for certain she has no sensitivities rubber (commonly called "Jelly") toys, I would stick with the hard plastic ones. If she is not exactly the novice when it comes to adult toys, I recommend either a Sybian or a Love Swing as these are both items you can share. Getting pounded from behind while riding a Sybian is a sensation she will not soon forget! Toys range in price from $10 to over $1000, depending on the type of toy you are purchasing, name brand and other factors. No matter how pricey the toy, there are a few things that will cause the toy to deteriorate. NEVER store your toy with batteries still inside of them. It wears out the contacts and causes the toy to wear out faster. If you are going to wear out a toy, at least enjoy it (Wink Wink!) Always wash toys immediately after using them. You can buy toy cleaner or use antibacterial liquid soap on them. Pat or air-dry your toy, never put it away wet. I save the original packaging usually and store them that way. Should you choose a jelly toy, be cautious on storing them. Color transfer from one to the other has been known to occur and they are lint magnets like you would not believe! NEVER, EVER share a sex toy! Oh, and Tibbs, be SURE to stock up on the flavored lube! A pocket rocket is fun but it is basically just an appetizer, you will still be the main course! Here aer a few places to get the shopping started:

XXXPress Toys

Adam & Eve

Sybian

[July 17, 2007] - Ok, this is ALMOST a trick question! *giggle* For manual masturbation, I generally reccommend cocoa butter (Palmers, no pun intended, makes a great one). Palmers is awesome, because it can also be used for a light lube with your woman. It does not get gooky and is absorbed by your skin, making clean up easier. For vaginal sex with your sweetie, nothing beats water-based lubes, such as AstroGlide or Moist. Keeps in mind that household stuff, like Vaseline, breaks down condoms and is a mess to clean up...stick to lubes that were made for sex! Some of the flavored lubes sound like they taste better than they do. Let the licker of the lick-and-stick arrangement taste a bit on her fingertip before you slather that goop all over your pole! When it comes to anal loving, a more viscous lube is needed. Adam&Eve Pro Anal Lube (withOUT the numbing agent) works well here. As I have stated before, I am not a fan of anal lubes with numbing agents. Too easy to injure and not realize it! I hope this helps some!

Stay sexy!

[July 17, 2007] - Hi Deana! Well, it might be as simple as: You have a killer pussy! Actually, sex toy care is often over-looked. Here are a few basics: Before you use your toy for the first time, wash it with warm water and a mild soap. Silicone dildos (NOT vibrators) can go in the top rack of the dishwasher. To avoid melting rubber, attachments and rubber toys can be soaked in one part bleach to ten parts water for 10-15 minutes, rinsed, then left to air dry. NEVER store your toy with the batteries still in it. It can burn out the little motor mechanism, or corrode and damage the battery terminal. Wipe your vibe with warm water after each use, allow it to air dry. You may also use a condom on your toy to make clean up easier. Any toy used anally must be thouroughly cleaned before using it anywhere else, or you risk infecting areas not normally exposed to the bacterium in your digestive tract. NASTY infection possibilities, there! Also, never take a toy in to the bath with you unless it was designed to be used in water. No sense killing the toy and possibly shocking your critter-getter!

Good luck Deana!