Ask Kayla Quinn

Hun, you and your S.O. (Significant Other) need to sit down and have a chat. Unless you tell him what does and does not trip your trigger, he is unlikely to stumble across (much less remember) the correct sequence of events! It's unfair of you to expect him to be sexually psychic.

The fact that you were able to achieve orgasm at 12 (although, I am not 100% sure that was an actual orgasm based on your youth, inexperience and stimuli mentioned, but....) yet are unable to do so now concerns me. Was there a traumatic event, either physically or emotionally, around that time? Was the "orgasm" you experienced the only one or were there more that stopped at the same point in your life?

First off, I think it important to verify that you've ruled out physical hindrances to the ability to climax. A physical exam is first on the list of recommendations. Should that reveal no issues, explore your ability to trust your partner(s). Good sex is difficult to share in a bad relationship! Some introspective searching won't help either. You would be amazed at how subconscious perceptions/ideas about sex and sexuality can creep up and tank a perfectly good orgasm!

Might be time for you to experiment a little bit...step outside your bedroom routines...Have you tried pairing penetration with clitoral stimulation...Either via fingers or a vibrating cock ring? Various positions been explored? Honestly, I am a firm believer in: If you cannot get yourself off, do not expect others to be able to do so either!

Invest in a sex toy or two and get to know your body! Your vagina, clitoris and labias...both major AND minor!

Once you know what it takes to rock your world, it'll be easier to coach someone else to victory!